why God made moms

This was forwarded to me by a great friend (thanks Lauren!) and it was too funny not to share.  Enjoy!  ♥ Lisa

WHY GOD MADE MOMS
Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?
1.  She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2.  Mostly to clean the house.
3.  To help us out of there when we were getting born.


How did God make mothers?
1.  He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2.  Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3.  God made my mom just the same like he made me.  He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?

1.  God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2.  They had to get their start from men’s bones.  Then they mostly use string, I think.


Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1.  We’re related.
2.  God knew she likes me a lot more than other people’s mom like me.


What kind of a little girl was your mom?
1.  My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2.  I don’t know because I wasn’t there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3.  They say she used to be nice.


What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1.  His last name.
2.  She had to know his background.  Like is he a crook?  Does he get drunk on beer?
3.  Does he make at least $800 a year?  Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?


Why did your mom marry your dad?
1.  My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world.  And my mom eats a lot.
2.  She got too old to do anything else with him.
3.  My grandma says that mom didn’t have her thinking cap on.


Who’s the boss at your house?
1.  Mom doesn’t want to be boss, but she has to because dad’s such a goof ball.
2.  Mom.  You can tell by room inspection.  She sees the stuff under the bed.
3.  I guess mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.


What’s the difference between moms and dads?
1..  Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2.  Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them..
3.  Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power ’cause that’s who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.
4.  Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.


What does your mom do in her spare time?
1.  Mothers don’t do spare time.
2.  To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.


What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1.  On the inside she’s already perfect.  Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2.  Diet.  You know, her hair.  I’d diet, maybe blue.


If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1.  She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean.  I’d get rid of that.
2.  I’d make my mom smarter.  Then she would know it was my sister who did it not me.
3.  I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

(unknown source)

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hello moon

Hello moon. It’s great to see you, finally. I’m freaking exhausted. I’ve looked forward to our rendezvous all day. You look beautiful as always. Bright and pure as you light up the night sky. Now excuse me while my head hits the pillow and my body lies still for the next six to eight hours (hopefully, fingers crossed). Hold on. I don’t know why I just said that. I jinxed myself.

Yep.  Where’s some wood?

Knock on wood.

Knock on wood!

Knock on wood!

Quick.

Hurry up!

Whaaaa!!!”

Too late.

There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep.

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

salute the sun and your health

This beautiful rendition of the classic Sun Salutation (Surya Namaskar) was created by Inne Choi and can be found here.

Morning is always a hectic time for me as a mom. Force my body out of bed, get showered and dressed- get the kiddos up, washed, and changed. Make breakfast. Try and make them eat it. Grab a little something for myself and we’re out the door.

Morning is also the perfect time for me to get in a little exercise to help prepare my mind and body for the day ahead. After much trial and error deciding on a rise and shine, “get fit fast” routine, I’ve finally found (and fallen in love with) Surya Namaskar or Sun Salutation.

Sun Salutation consists of a beautiful set of asanas that massages, detoxifies, and stimulates almost every organ of the human body and brings suppleness to the spine. It is a wonderful way to warm up and stretch at the same time. 

In just ten minutes, your body gets a comprehensive and systematic workout. No other exercise routine can surpass it. It makes the body strong, supple and flexible and tones every part of the body. The back is bent and straightened, the abdomen is compressed and stretched, it loosens up all joints, flexes the muscles, massaging internal organs, and activates all the systems of the body.

Sun Salutations are a series of 12 postures, linked by the breath, in one single flow:

  1. Stand with both feet touching. Bring your hands together, palm to palm, at the heart. Make sure your weight is evenly distributed. Exhale.
  2. Raise your arms upward. Slowly bend backward, stretching arms above the head. Relax your neck. Inhale.
  3. Exhale while you slowly bend forward until your hands are in line with your feet, touching your head to your knees, if possible. Press your palms down, fingertips in line with toes (bend your knees if you have to), and touch the floor.
  4. Move your right leg back behind your body in a wide lunge. As you inhale, keep your hands and feet on the ground, with your left foot between your hands, and raise your head.
  5. Bring your left foot together with your right foot.
  6. Exhale as you lower your body, resting on your forearms.
  7. As you inhale, lower your pelvis to the ground and raise your head and bend backward as far as possible, while straightening your arms.
  8. Putting your hand on the ground and keeping your arms straight, raise your hips and align your head with your arms. Exhale.
  9. Slowly inhale and bend your right leg to take a wide forward step. Keeping your hands firmly on the ground, place your right foot between your hands and lift your head up.
  10. Keeping your hands in place, bring both feet together. Straighten your legs but keep your waist bent and upper body lowered. Touch your head to your knees, if possible. Exhale.
  11. Slowly rise, straightening your back into a standing pose. Bend backward, stretching your arms above your head as you inhale.
  12. Return to position number 1. Exhale.

Remember to decide how many Sun Salutations you do and how fast you do them by listening to your body. If you’re a beginner, start by doing two: one for health and one for well-being! As you advance, start your morning by doing three and building from there. Side note: I also incorporate Sun Salutations into my day whenever I’m feeling tired or stressed.

Salute the sun and your health every morning.

dr. lisa

any direction you choose

I’m not a fan of negativity, pessimism, glass half empty rhetoric, or anything of the sort. I used to think that most others felt the same way. Then I delved a little deeper and I was kinda surprised at what I found. The mommy world certainly has its fill of Debbie Downers, controversy seekers, and complainers.

As a mom, I try my hardest to do the right things for my family. I read empowering books, set goals for success, and have a positive attitude with myself and others. As you already know, it’s extremely hard to keep this outlook all of the time. In fact, I’m quite sure that it’s probably impossible. Especially when I’m Owning it and OMing it all freaking day long! That being said, I do what I can to keep myself from going over to the dark side. Motherhood is certainly not always easy, but nothing worth doing ever is.

Some moms often wonder how to stay positive in their thoughts and actions, especially when times are tough or when they’re unhappy or unsatisfied. Some moms even find it hard to be positive when things are well. This is when we start comparing our lives to others, judging and criticizing others (often to make ourselves feel better), and thriving on being negative: Whoa is me, the sky is falling! You’re an overachiever! blah blah blah. Sometimes we start to sound like kindergarteners!

Okay mommies, real change comes from within:

1. Recognize where you are and focus on where you want to be.

2. Make your decisions with positive intent and purpose.

3. Choose to surround yourself with positive, successful (work, mommyhood, friendship) and inspiring people.

4. Offer the best you have to others.

5. Blaze your own trail.

The road to negativity and mediocrity is easy.

dr. lisa

hang up the gloves

When it comes to motherhood, all bets are off. Any woman out there will tell you that having a baby changes everything. Motherhood is an incredibly important job AND an incredibly hard job. There is no instruction manual to follow. No step-by-step guide for guaranteed success. We all just take a deep breath and jump in.

That being said, there is an enormous amount of pressure for us to do everything the “right way” when it comes to raising a family. This pressure comes from expectations we’ve set for ourselves, as well as from outside sources such as our own moms, family members, friends and yes, even strangers. And probably the harshest critics of all: OTHER MOMS. No one tells you before you become a mom that you will soon be entering the Mommy Wars. A place where everyone has an opinion of what you’re doing wrong, what you should be doing instead, and why they want to punch you in the throat.

I think one of the hottest topics when it comes to bringing up babies is breastfeeding. There seems to be this ongoing war between moms about the pressures to breastfeed, the successes and failures, how long to do it (short-term, extended), and the thought that bottle-feeding (not only formula, but breast milk as well- yikes!) somehow makes you inferior as a mother. This is all a bunch of malarkey. While everyone clearly understands that breast milk is best, there are barriers that keep 100% of all moms from breastfeeding. Some of these include milk production (or lack thereof), premature deliveries, latching problems, medications, single-parenting, working full-time, lack of support, etc., etc. Add to those the fact that breastfeeding is certainly not all sunshine, lollipops, rainbows, and lemon drops all of the time.

Breastfeeding is hard work. Bleeding nipples, cracked nipples, inverted nipples, flat nipples, blah, blah, ouch. Exhaustion, confusion, infection. Cradle hold, cross-over hold, football hold. The list goes on and on. You know what else is hard work? Yep, you guessed it- everything else that goes along with having a new baby in your life.

I am a breastfeeding mom. I exclusively breastfed both of my children well past one year of age (ages two and three if truth be told). I was extremely lucky and my babies were perfect little latchers. I had a great supply (I seriously could have fed a small country) and everything just seemed to click for me. What does this mean for you? Really it should mean nothing. I am not in competition with you. I do what’s best for my kids and my family and I would expect you to do the same.

The greatest caveat to achieving and maintaining the health of my children and myself is AWARENESS.  It is unacceptable for me to “just go with the flow” so to say when it comes to decisions that impact my family. It takes education, tons of reading, mucho support, and a “BIG” set of balls to stand firm in my beliefs. I take what I learn and apply it to my life as best I can. If others warrant my opinion or advice, then I give it. I’ve created this blog to help, not to divide.

The bottom line: Be confident and secure in the choices you make for your kids and there will be absolutely no room for others to knock you down. I can only hope that sometime soon we see motherhood as a journey we’re all facing together.

So ladies, whatta ya say-

Shall we hang up the gloves?

dr . lisa

one thousand and one

As moms, we are everything to our children. They see us as the smartest, the funniest, the nicest, the prettiest, the cuddliest, the oldest, the fastest, the strongest. Meeting their day-to-day expectations of us can be hard and daunting sometimes, but it can also be quite simple, really.

This is part of a conversation I had with my three-year-old little boy the other day:

No honey. Besides the fact that dinosaurs don’t live here anymore, I’m pretty sure we couldn’t fit one in our living room or in our kitchen for that matter. They are kinda big.

thanks kiddo.

lisa