Go Ahead and Roll Her in Glitter

Go ahead and roll her glitter.

Wait. What? Did I just utter those words? Why yes. Yes I did.

It happened a few weeks ago. Ella, my six-year-old, was at a birthday party at a place called, “Little Diva’s Day Spa.” I know. I know. A nightmare turned into reality. I remember anxiety setting in as I read the invitation –

Join us for little Susie’s 6th Birthday Party! Manicures! Eye make-up! A little girl’s dream!

My first thoughts were – Oh crap! Here we go. All the little girls doing “little girly” things like getting their nails painted and putting on fancy white (wedding) dresses. Getting their make-up done (UGH!) and being all diva-princessy was enough to make me gag. Twice. Okay maybe THREE times.

Blech! Are we not in the 21st century? I did not have a daughter so that I could put a tiara on her head, a tutu around her waist, and roll her in some periwinkle glitter glue. She is going to be a doctor, gosh damn it!

I remember back when I was pregnant with Ella, we had decided not to find out her gender because we –

#1. Wanted to be surprised the day of her birth and…

#2. We did not want to be bombarded with a bunch of pink, “girly” things.

Fast forward six years and here I am standing proudly alongside my glitterfied Ella in the middle of a beauty salon! What the hell happened?

Well, life happened. Ella has grown into the most creative and beautiful little girl. She loves soccer and gymnastics. She loves painting, coloring, and building trains with her brother. She enjoys going on hikes and nature hunts. She makes mud pies and swims. She wears blue and green and orange and pink. Polka dots, stripes, and ribbons. She dons baseball caps and plays football with her friends. She likes her riding boots, roller skates, and jumping in rain puddles. Dolls, trucks, airplanes, and Legos. Helping in the garden. Picking herbs, picking weeds, and planting veggies. Climbing trees and doing somersaults with her best friends. Playing computer games and writing stories. And…

She LOVES glitter. She loved having her nails painted. (They were painted cute little peek-a-boo penguins by the way!) She loved playing dress-up and had a great time at her friend’s birthday party at yep you guessed it, “Little Diva’s Day Spa.” She twirled and played together beautifully with her friends. She giggled and sang and enjoyed every second.

What defines her is not one GLITTERFIED (I like that word) moment at a salon or a pink stroller or a pink hat, but the whole kit-n-caboodle. The whole lot of choices that we make for ourselves and our kids. The guidance we show our children and the balance we instill along the way.

If I hope to teach my daughter one thing about being a woman it would be:

Feminism to me means having a choice. Not only the freedom to like what I want and to be what I want BUT more importantly to understand how my choices collectively impact others. To choose positive empowerment. To work hard and respect others and the decisions they’ve made in their own lives. To be treated fairly and equally and to reciprocate those ideas. To live in a society where no one is pressured to be like anyone else. And to be okay with it all.

Except when it comes to glitter.

We can all use a little glitter.

$50 Shabby Apple Giveaway!

All right ladies {drum roll please}….It’s time to get your shabby on!  This week Shabby Apple is teaming up with Mommy OM and offering a grand prize giveaway of $50 to be used in their store on any product.  From dresses to fitness wear, bathing suits to jewelry and accessories – this store has it all (except organic! Hopefully they are working on that one!).  Shabby Apple designs are intended to meet the fashion needs of women today.  Gorgeous colors mixed throughout an array of collections to make women feel feminine and beautiful for who they are.

Loving the black.

And the white.

How about some color?


 They even have dresses for little girls.  So adorable!  I think I’m in ♥.

Great patterns!

It’s easy to sign up for this giveaway, just follow the mandatory steps below:

1. You must be a follower of my blog and Facebook page (which you probably are because you are reading this!) and comment below or on Facebook to enter.

2. You must go and ‘like’ Shabby Apple on Facebook.

3. You must visit shabbyapple.com and comment below on which dress you absolutely LOVE!  This one is tough because there are so so so many!

This giveaway will close on Friday May 11, 2012 at midnight. Contestants must have a USA shipping address to be eligible for entry.  One lucky winner will be notified by email so make sure you use your correct email address.  Winner will be chosen using random.org.

Don’t forget to share this giveaway with your friends on Facebook and Pinterest!

Enjoy Shabby Apple!

peace, love, no more mommy wars

[begin rant…

With the declaration of January Jones eating her placenta and Alicia Silverstone pre-chewing her baby’s food, the ‘Mommy Wars’ seem to be back in full swing these past couple weeks.  Just when I thought we had hung up the gloves, now I’m doubting this will ever happen.  At least not anytime soon.  And after reading some comments from the many blog posts written about this last week – I’m really starting to understand why this will never happen and it’s not as simple as pure disagreement.  I think I figured out at least a few important contributors-

1.  “Fear” or “discomfort” with the unknown.

2.  Lack of knowledge.

3.  No desire to acquire said knowledge.

4.  Ignorance.

I’m sure there are many more factors that breed this divide, but in my experience as a mother (a whole five years of it, I know I’m far from expert status) I really feel that when women [and men and grandparents and aunts and uncles and strangers] are indifferent to each other’s parenting ways – it’s mostly because of a general lack of understanding.  What works for my family may not work for yours and I get that, but do you?

A great quote:

The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about. – Wayne Dyer

In general, when we are faced with something that may make us uncomfortable (in Momville this may include placenta encapsulation, elimination communication, home birth, co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding and so on) we tend to act with a quick rush to judgement without really thinking it through.

Some comments I found:

  • I really believe that so much of the crunchy mom shit is for the benefit of the neurotic mother and not the kid. Let’s strap the kid to me 24 hrs a day, and watch his face to see if he needs a crap instead of putting diapers on, and pre chew his food, and give him booby milk every time he cries till he’s 8, and basically anything else that is that most inconvenient way to do anything so they can be the Best Mommy Martyr and look down on those ‘mainstream moms’.
  • She’s still nursing her nearly four-year old child?  Talk about attachment.
  • Holy hell! I hadnt heard of “silverstoning” and I am beyond disgusted! What is she, a momma bird? If the kid cant eat it on his own then I have a great idea…. DON’T FEED IT TO HIM! She will probably continue to breatfeed him thru highschool as well.
  • …she still breastfeeds her 3 1/2 year old, all of her children sleep in the same bed as her and her husband, and none of her children have ever worn diapers.I’m not sure how that worked with babies in the bed with them! Nuts
  • THREE AND A HALF??? If you’re old enough to spell “T-I-T-S,” you’re too old to drink from them.
  • It’s not the co-sleeping thing alone that’s weird. It’s the no diapers plus co-sleeping!!!
  • Agreed. Also you should right about the extremists that use breastmilk for everything…I know a mom that shot it up her kid’s nose when he had a cold. I have also heard of using it for pink eye. Thanks but I’ll stick to the drops the doc prescribes!

So I ask all moms, how do we propose to open the minds and hearts of other women?  Is it even possible?  I realize that we ALL have different opinions on subjects such as parenting, but the judging and crudeness out there in Mommyland is alive and kicking.  And believe you me, I am well aware that it’s not just a one way street attack on ‘crunchy’ moms, this street has many twists and turns and likes to tear down SAHMs, working moms, bottle feeding, formula feeding, crib sleeping, co-sleeping, vaccinators, non-vaccinators, home-schoolers, private-schoolers, public-schoolers, soccer, helicopter – you name it.

Why can’t we as moms just accept that everyone will not parent the same way we do?   Why is that so hard to comprehend?   Why do we feel the need to be harsh and judgmental towards others?  Is it satisfying?  Does it feed our own ego?  Does it help make us feel better about our own choices?  Is it productive?  Entertainment?  What do you think?

…end rant.]